Most Jamaican women are terrified of lizards. There about twenty-two different lizard species that can be found in Jamaica. The ones that are feared the most are the Jamaican Giant Anole (Anolis garmani) which we call large green lizards, Jamaican Brown Anole (Anolis lineatopus) known as common lizards and the dreaded Croaking Lizard (Aristelliger praesignis) which are geckos.
While I never truly understand the reasons women are terrified of lizards. I can only speculate that it might be related to the Biblical story about Lot’s wife turning into a pillar of salt. Nevertheless, if you are in Jamaica and you hear a wretched female scream chances are it will be because of a creepy croaking lizard.
Once I received a frantic call from my cousin about a creepy croaking lizard in her house. She wanted to know if I could come over and get rid of the lizard which meant killing the feared reptile. Apparently she was getting ready to relax after arriving home from work when she saw one of the dreaded reptiles on her bedroom window. It would have taken me about an hour to reach her house. Consequently, I told my cousin to find other means of getting rid of the lizard and that was the end of our telephone call.The next day I called my cousin to find out what happened to the lizard. She told me that after she got off the phone with me the evening before she called the emergency number for the community police station for help. She said the officer that answered the telephone told her to leave the intruder and stealthily retrieve her broom. The officer told her to return to her room with the broom and covertly approach the creepy croaking lizard in military style. He told to clap the “rass” lizard with the broom and that should take care of her small problem. With trepidation but yet with precision she executed the plan as instructed. However, upon closer inspection of the crime scene litter with threaded pieces from her once elegant glass window she realized the creepy croaking lizard was actually on the outside of her bedroom window. The creepy croaking lizard in true Theodore Roosevelt style "Do what you can, with what you have, where you are" flew through the smashed windows and laughed at my cousin from the comfort for her bed.
Another time my friend was driving when she saw an unwelcome passenger on the dashboard of her car. She stopped suddenly dead in the middle of the road. She jumped out of her car with the engine and gear still engaged. In state of panic she created a massive traffic jam. She abandoned her car and sprinted faster than Usain Bolt across the opposite side of the street. She frantically held onto the first stranger she could find for help. She explained her plight and begged the young man to rescue her from her predicament. The young man looked into her fearful eyes and told her he was not crossing the street because of a damn lizard in her car. With fear in his own eyes he told her he too was afraid of creepy croaking lizards and with that he turned and ran in the opposite direction. Later the traffic police came. They removed my friend’s car and hand her a ticket.
As Charles Dickens said “There is nothing in the world so irresistibly contagious as laughter and good humour.”……… Find something to laugh about today. Have a fun filled weekend!
Mark McKenzie is a leading Subject Matter Expert in financial services regulation and supervision as well as a professional motivational speaker, corporate trainer and youth mentor. He can be contacted by email mastbmckenzie@gmail.com or by telephone 647-406-4622. Read my blog http://mastbmckenzie.blogspot.ca/ and always write me a comment and share. Follow me on Twitter @mackynacky. Connect with me on www.youtube.com, Google+, Facebook and Linkedin.
No comments:
Post a Comment